Which One's Stupider Game
Welcome game fans to today’s installment of 'Which One's Stupider'. Today we have three worthy contestants who will vie for that coveted title of which one is the biggest knuckle-head. Well, let's not waste anymore time and introduce our three contestants:
Contestant number 1 hails from the great state of Ohio, where he attended The Ohio State University, under the tutelage of Jim Tressel, he was a part of their National Championship team. The fame and glory of winning was clearly not enough for our wiley youngster so he decided to falsify police records, skip classes, drop out of school, and make up false allegations against his former team. But he didn't stop there! Not a chance! This guy decided to be represented by the ever-controversial Jim Brown and challenge the early-entry rule of the NFL. Unphased by his inability to get this overturned, he eventually made it into the NFL with the Broncos willing to take a chance on him in the 3rd round of the NFL draft. Showing up out of shape and a little slower than his college days, a minor injury helped the Broncos be motivated to cut him, leaving him, once again unemployed. Eventually this little go-getter ended up in the back alley of a bar robbing patrons at gunpoint. Let's have a big round of applause for our first contestant:
Maurice Clarett
Contestant number 2 is a man surrounded by success, an older brother in the NFL was all the role model this young little tike needed. Following in his footsteps, the youngster went to Virginia Tech. The potential in him was undeniable: many were quick to note that he actually possessed better skills than his brother. It was spring and the world was his, unfortunately there was the lure of young girls, minors to be exact. Frank Beamer is a man of principal, but the talented boy had the magical spark he needed. After serving a 1 year suspension, he was back on the team and looking pretty good, until he decided to intentionally kick a player from the opposing team in a bowl game. Frank's hand was forced and he cut him from the team. Still, there were plenty of NFL teams that would take a chance on this guy: after all he was the complete package. Later that week, he thought it was a great idea to point a gun at three teenagers in a McDonald's parking lot. Without further ado, let me introduce contestant number 2:
Marcus Vick
Our last young fellow also resides in Ohio. There was little indication of the instability of this player when he was in College at West Virginia. In a game with Rutgers this feisty fellow received two personal foul penalties and was ejected from the game. His coach benched him for half of the next game, saying that he was as disgrace to his teammates and the university. Undaunted, he eventually made it to the NFL draft where he was picked up in the third round. Being a rookie Wide Receiver on a team with two of the best in the NFL is tough, but this guy established himself as a reliable and talented third choice. On a routine traffic violation stop, this young scrapper was found having marijuana in his vehicle. The Bengal’s suspended him for a game for this, but he proceeded to perform well on his return. On the 2nd play in the AFC wildcard game against the Steelers, he got injured after making a spectacular catch from Carson Palmer. Palmer was also injured on the same play. Two weeks later he was arrested in Florida for brandishing a stolen 9mm gun with hollow-point rounds, pointing at a group of people, right in front of a Police officer. Let's waste no more time and introduce contestant number 3:
Chris Henry
And the winner is....
Contestant number 1 hails from the great state of Ohio, where he attended The Ohio State University, under the tutelage of Jim Tressel, he was a part of their National Championship team. The fame and glory of winning was clearly not enough for our wiley youngster so he decided to falsify police records, skip classes, drop out of school, and make up false allegations against his former team. But he didn't stop there! Not a chance! This guy decided to be represented by the ever-controversial Jim Brown and challenge the early-entry rule of the NFL. Unphased by his inability to get this overturned, he eventually made it into the NFL with the Broncos willing to take a chance on him in the 3rd round of the NFL draft. Showing up out of shape and a little slower than his college days, a minor injury helped the Broncos be motivated to cut him, leaving him, once again unemployed. Eventually this little go-getter ended up in the back alley of a bar robbing patrons at gunpoint. Let's have a big round of applause for our first contestant:
Maurice Clarett
Contestant number 2 is a man surrounded by success, an older brother in the NFL was all the role model this young little tike needed. Following in his footsteps, the youngster went to Virginia Tech. The potential in him was undeniable: many were quick to note that he actually possessed better skills than his brother. It was spring and the world was his, unfortunately there was the lure of young girls, minors to be exact. Frank Beamer is a man of principal, but the talented boy had the magical spark he needed. After serving a 1 year suspension, he was back on the team and looking pretty good, until he decided to intentionally kick a player from the opposing team in a bowl game. Frank's hand was forced and he cut him from the team. Still, there were plenty of NFL teams that would take a chance on this guy: after all he was the complete package. Later that week, he thought it was a great idea to point a gun at three teenagers in a McDonald's parking lot. Without further ado, let me introduce contestant number 2:
Marcus Vick
Our last young fellow also resides in Ohio. There was little indication of the instability of this player when he was in College at West Virginia. In a game with Rutgers this feisty fellow received two personal foul penalties and was ejected from the game. His coach benched him for half of the next game, saying that he was as disgrace to his teammates and the university. Undaunted, he eventually made it to the NFL draft where he was picked up in the third round. Being a rookie Wide Receiver on a team with two of the best in the NFL is tough, but this guy established himself as a reliable and talented third choice. On a routine traffic violation stop, this young scrapper was found having marijuana in his vehicle. The Bengal’s suspended him for a game for this, but he proceeded to perform well on his return. On the 2nd play in the AFC wildcard game against the Steelers, he got injured after making a spectacular catch from Carson Palmer. Palmer was also injured on the same play. Two weeks later he was arrested in Florida for brandishing a stolen 9mm gun with hollow-point rounds, pointing at a group of people, right in front of a Police officer. Let's waste no more time and introduce contestant number 3:
Chris Henry
And the winner is....
posted by DougALug at 12:18 PM
2 Comments:
Maurice Clarett.
He's a goner from the NFL for good. Every action he took blew the mind on just how absurd one guy's thought-process is.
RE: Marcus Vick... maaaaah, somebody'll probably give him a chance as a late round pick, and he can still stick or be a practice-squadder because of his athletic ability. NFL Europe maybe.
RE: Chris Henry. Marijuana? He'll be back. Possessing a gun? He'll be back. Carrying hollow point shells? No problemo for the NFL just so long as he can still perform well as the third receiver. Did he actually shoot the gun when he pointed at people? If not, a good lawyer worth his salt will have Henry back playing by training camp.
It'd be nice to hear every one of these guys say, "Man, I'm an idiot," but I don't think that's going to happen. You just hope there isn't another Rae Carruth timebomb, especially in Henry's case.
Rich, Chris,
My money is on Chris Henry. Here is my logic:
Clarett is washed up. His career is pretty much toast. A life of crime seems like a good fit for his other qualities. Maurice's is typical stupid.
Vick has the potential to be a great player, but he isn't yet. It is a safe bet that he will be playing pro. His actions were just plain stupid.
Henry has proven he has the goods for the NFL. He was on his way to being a premiere player in th NFL. The marijuana was pretty darn stupid, but then to add to that his little gun incident is just completely inexcusable. Henry was the only one of these three was sure money and here he is throwing it all away. I elect him as the king of the stoopies.
-Doug
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