Friday, February 17, 2006

My All Mental Squad


Enough philosophy for a while! Let’s talk about basketball. With the Magic once again faltering into oblivian, I am drawn back to the rest of the league, and more importantly, players who seem to be a few cards short of a full deck. Players in this elite squad seem to have everything physically: they are hardened veterans of the game, but the inability to overcome their own mental demons have crippled them beyond repair. I am focusing on active players. That negates players like Dennis Rodman (The Worm), Brian Williams (Bison Dele), as well as Karl Malone (The Mailman). Interstingly enough Karl was one of my favorite players of all time, this isn't about liking, this is about players exhibiting self-destructive behaviors.

I have my starting five. I am asking people to add to my list with reasons why they are there:

Tracy McGrady: Okay, I’ll admit it! As a magic-fan, I have something against this wall-eyed Rocket. As a Magic player, T-Mac would make comments like “I can’t carry the team!” New flash Tracy: You weren’t. The Magic amassed only 21 wins 2 seasons ago with him as our anchor, and most fans weren’t too sad to see ‘Me-Mac’ part ways with the organization. Tracy’s mouth made fans cringe at both his arrogance and completely disregarding his teammates contributions. There were signs earlier about this guy, but we ignored them because of all of his apparent talent. One of the biggest signs of things to come was his inability to finish out games. Many, including myself, attributed some of this to him putting everything into a game and having nothing left for the end. I know now that it wasn’t really longevity, it was just simply nerves. Many have talked about Steve Francis and his many problems. While many of these gripes are true, there is one thing I like about Steve much more than Tracy. Steve has ice in his veins for that infamous last shot. I am far less nervous with Steve taking that final shot.

Chris Webber: Can one play fate a player to a life of being a team-virus? In Webber’s case, I’d have to say yes. College Basketball fans will ever remember that fateful 1993 championship against North Carolina where he tried to call a timeout with none left. Webber’s attitude and ability to give NBA teams amazing hope going into finals give him the virtual lock as the king of disappointing finality. Now he signs on with the Sixer’s. Wow! Could dysfunction be better paired? I submit to you that it could not!

Allen Iverson: Scoring master… Ball-hog extraordinaire, Allen stands alone as the most selfish player in the NBA. Tattoo-laden, locks-a-blazin’, and ‘tude ever-present, Iverson, shoots his entire team out of games. There is no doubt that he has talent: every game is a parade of circus shots and great steals, but watching his teammates stand around and watch the Allen-show, tells you all that you need to know about how the Iverson’s game plan is killing them. It’s not that Allen is bad, though it is apparent that he can’t be coached: he takes stupid shots, with players wide-open under the rim and unfortunately he makes many of them: this has built his ego to an intolerable level. Amazingly Webber and Iverson together have made for an odd little happy family. It remains to see if crazy can negate crazy.

Latrell Sprewell: Did you know he tried to choke his coach, P.J. Carlisimo, in the middle of a game no less? Enough said.

Paul Pierce: My last guy is a great player with a lot of heart, but firstly, he spells his name wrong ('Pearce' looks so much better!). The Celtics need this guy and his amazing playing potential. What they could do without are his total lapses and disappearances in key parts of the game and season. Pierce has numb-moments where his defense just doesn’t exist. He shoots long-silly shots and then yells at refs because they won’t call fouls. All the while, his team is looking for a little leadership, not an adult cry-baby. Come on man! Come to the game!

I have a couple of runner-ups: Kelvin Cato, Alonzo Mourning, and Anferne Hardaway (he still is barely playing) to name a few. There are many more… please join in.

-Doug

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